Water Cooler Talk 12-17-14

Weekly random thoughts. Since I’m self-employed it’s my version of water cooler talk: no one to talk to so it goes out to cyberspace. 

Does Rudolph have brights?

I wonder if hummingbirds wish sometimes they could just fly in quiet?

Bologna is the misfit toy of the Holiday meats this time of year.

I’ve heard the saying ‘time marches on,’ but why can’t it just stand in one place and move its legs up and down while I catch up?

I was bored so I switched the 60 watt bulbs in my apartment for the 120 watt ones and now my living room feels like a Dicken’s novel and my bathroom is a funhouse of wrinkles, nose hair and chapped lips I hadn’t noticed.

I wonder if hot pockets find themselves gross as well and hate to touch each other?

My slinky just got here from 1970.

It has finally aged just right and I an opened up that pitcher of lemonade that I saved from the stand forty years ago.

 

 

 

 

 

Superheroes Subbing for Santa

iron-man

The recent rash of movies released by Marvel has brought the super heroes back into our lives and they save damsels in distress, small children, and cats in trees. But why not save the guy who’s out traversing the entire world in one night and bringing joy to all its children? Why not fill in for Santa?

Now one might say that these guys are pretty bulky and can’t get down a chimney, but let’s face it that little old man in the red suit has got a belly as big as their shoulders. And why not work in teams so for instance the Hulk does the heavy lifting with all the sacks and tosses them to Spiderman who slinks down with the goodies?

Considering the man power, strength, concentration and pure speed, I say they’re done in two hours tops! They get to really help out a nice guy so it’s a rest for them from dealing with the villain. And a really nice guy who has been doing this for years, get’s a night off.

Pros:

Iron Man, Super Man, and probably Thor can top the speed of the reindeer.

Usually very quick on their feet to react to any unforeseen circumstances.

They don’t sleep anyways.

They really never seem to eat much so cookies are good.

And being wholesome I’m sure they love milk (except for maybe Iron Man.)

Cons:

There are none!

Ok, how do we cal them? I only know of the Bat phone for communication and I think that guy might be a bad choice, he’d skew a little too much towards the naughty.

 

 

A Conversation Between Angels CXX

“Hello, I’m Peter.”

“Bob.”

“Yes I know.”

“Right. So you’re St. Peter?”

“Here it’s just Peter. So we have set you up. Two bedroom suite.”

“Great.”

“Jacuzzi I assume.”

“Yes, fantastic.”

“And of course we have several women ready for you. Blonde, brunette, redhead.”

“This is really heaven! I’m getting all these things?!”

“No. Not really. Sorry I couldn’t resist, I rarely get to joke around.”

“Some saint.”