Chance of Rain: 100%

 

It’s Wednesday, which means this self-employed guy has to use all of you for his water cooler talk and submit my random thoughts.

Why can we pay bills online, they’re even paying for things with smart phones now, but the laundromat change machine won’t accept a slightly wrinkled $1 bill?

Why are they making dryer sheets so heavy now no one can pick them up and carry them to the garbage?

Boy I have been out of touch working so much at home on this web design gig. I did not know that it was now common speaking style to use f*ck every other word. Every one was speaking that way at the laundromat and I felt so out of touch. I guess it replaced using “like” every other word here in Southern California.

Note to self’s mental health self: Never forget your earphones when doing laundry at the laundromat.

Yesterday I chased an ice cream truck for ten blocks only to discover it was just a white van driven by a guy with an ice cream truck ring tone.

Do they make “Really Great Glue?” Because every time I open a Super Glue, it glues it self shut and I only get that one use.

I’m really strong. I break rubber bands every time I stretch them.

There is currently no better candy in the world than pretzel M& M’s. They are a sweet salty sensation. And they make me poetic.

If the chance of rain is 100%, why is it still a chance?

My best friend from second grade, Ian Brown, still hasn’t found me.