Won’t You Please Give

charity

 

Ladies and gentlemen, these people need us, please pick a charity to support.

Shuffle

This charity helps those who are afflicted with the brain disorder that affects their ability to pull the back of their shoe on and are only able to smash it down.

Out to Sea

This charity gives money to those that still have a land line so they can replace them with cellular.

The Hebrew Project

Such an easy one, because for a just a few dollars per person, this charity will provide “arrow” signs for people to understand they should walk on the left side of the sidewalk, just like cars, so everyone can pass.

Pillow Talk

This is a long time coming. This international charity insures that every man, woman and child has two pillows to sleep with-one for their head and one to squish between their arms and/or legs.

Girl Power

This charity gives money to the stars of the HBO series “Girls” so they can get therapy. Man that’s some serious stuff on that show.

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Open For Business

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Hey Everybody. Please excuse my promotion, but I need to pay off my credit card debt. ūüôā

Just opened a web design business and if you need a new site, this is the time because it is 40% off through Tax Day April 15 for a Grand Opening Special. Just click on the picture.

Say It Ain’t So Disney

mickey

I grew up in a time where I thought you could have a pet cricket who wore a tuxedo and spats, slept in a matchbox and occasionally sang a tune. The magic was not delivered. And it’s all Disney’s fault.

Ok, that’s not fair. Warner Brothers, Charles Schulz and the guys that made Batman should share in the blame. My life has not turned out innocent, fantastical or animated.*

They blame video games on today’s youth’s apathy and the outbreak of violence. But it started with our generation because we were disappointed when we grew up so we haven’t paid enough attention. We’ve been asleep in the next room.

There hasn’t been enough “spoonfuls of sugar!”

It was all a subliminal campaign to draw us to theme parks and corporations. And it worked. I hope you feel good about yourself Mouse.

 

*Occasionally my friend’s read my blog and don’t realize I’m kidding. I have-honestly-never been happier.

Water Cooler Talk 3-20-13

Weekly random thoughts. Since I’m self-employed it’s my version of water cooler talk: no one to talk to so it goes out to cyberspace. Please feel free to comment, it would be nice to talk to someone other than myself.

If it takes a village to raise a child, how many people does it take to just get them to behave better.

If God made everything where did He come from?

(Just look up the answer to that one, you’ll be on the Internet for days.)

I don’t like watching new Simpsons episodes. For some reason, I like them better when they’re reruns. I don’t know why. Discuss.

While we’re on The Simpsons-I hate them. I hate them for being so creative for so long.

How can you listen to The Monkee’s “I’m a Believer” and not dance around like Snoopy?

If the Earth is always rotating, does it ever get tired, especially with what we keep feeding it?

I think the title should be changed to “Dancing With The D-List Stars.” The alliteration will roll off people’s tongues.

If everyone in every government would just stop working, for like a week, would everything fall apart or just the media that reports on it?

If blood is thicker than water, why does it wash away when you get a boo-boo?

Did my ex-girlfriends who said I broke their heart get them fixed?

Hello Fellow Bloggers

This is an additional posting for my fellow bloggers so if you don’t fall into that category don’t read this. I am – like- so serious.

Just want to know if anyone has experience moving their blog from the .com to .org. Don’t need technical help, I’ve just started a web design business and I’d like my blog to look cooler.

Had the traffic or exposure changed, specifically diminished?  Please feel free to email me direct or comment.

Thanks!

St. Patty’s Day: The Aftermath

The Hangover movie image Ed Helms (1)

 

All over the world, well at least Ireland and the countries that pretend to have very strong connections to Ireland, there are people waking up hungover. Every other holiday seems to have the next day off to recover, but not St. Patty’s Day.

So there will be people underperforming, eating very greasy food, and asking what they did last night. I don’t know, but I think, that the day after St. Patrick’s Day might be the biggest of the hangover days. And if you factor in the appearance of this holiday not necessarily falling on a Friday or Saturday like this year, the days that make up the St. Patrick’s Day weekend dwarf the runner-up New Year’s Eve. That’s because most people just count them as one.

New Year’s Eve is a big day, second only to Valentine’s Day, where it is oh so important what you do and whether or not you have a date. So the amount of alcohol consumed is less-sadness and depression are already affecting the brain’s activity and therefore you’ve already got a head start and those that have a date may still be sad or depressed or are worried about the impression they create. But March 17 doesn’t have any requirements other than you wear green (and the codes are¬†very relaxed) and drink beer. Or Jameson. Or pretty much anything you choose. People are happy, they start drinking early and since there’s no family to worry about getting into trouble with, it’s a free ride. Even those that celebrate it as a family (who really are Irish) give each other a mulligan.

Yep that’s it, everybody just puts on green and drinks. Few know what they’re really celebrating. Few know that originally blue was the color of the day and that¬†Saint Patrick is said to have used the shamrock, a three-leaved plant, to explain the¬†Holy Trinity¬†to the¬†pagan Irish. I don’t see a lot of church going in modern times. Nope, just buying silly hats, beads and glitter wigs. Giving the bars, apropos restaurants and liquor companies a chance to go “ahhhh.”

All in good fun. Hope everyone did have fun. Me, I don’t drink anymore so I feel great and it reminds me of one of the funniest lines I’ve ever heard –¬†“No one ever wakes up the next morning and says ‘Man, I wish I would have drank last night.'”