Sorry, on my way

No four words have the power to reverse the energy traveling in one direction more than “Sorry I’m on my way.” A boat can’t be put in reverse, a car can’t u-turn, a just proposed to woman can’t reject her lover with the same immediate about-face as fast as that simple, loaded, phrase.

Unlike the “it’s not you it’s me” or “do I look fat?” this phrase is consciously or unconsciously delivered to the person who is waiting and suddenly puts said person into the responsibility seat. A man that delivers the “it’s me” speech more often than not feels bad for the woman or he would have simple texted or emailed. A woman who asks if a dress makes her look fat often just wants to be hugged. But when someone calls or texts to say they’re running late they are often putting the fate, albeit often just temporarily, of the relationship, into the persons who is on time’s hands.

Because often the late one is waiting for a response. And one is left with how to respond. If you say that’s ok than you’re accepting that even though you worked out your busy schedule and made it on time then you may be setting a future precedence. But if you dare to give a sigh or a negative reaction you are almost certainly to be greeted with a huff and a puff plopping the insensitivity in your lap.

Now I don’t write this complaining about anyone in particular, I write this because of my fascination with we human beings reluctance to accept blame. We want to pass it off, deflect, reject and otherwise make someone else potentially responsible for our own shortcomings. It’s hard wired, I think, to keep us from being wracked with guilt and pre-occupied with our own inadequacies.

If not, we could go crazy, we would not sleep well any night…and we’d never meet anyone on time.