Water Cooler Talk 1-14-15

Weekly random thoughts. Since I’m self-employed it’s my version of water cooler talk: no one to talk to so it goes out to cyberspace. 

If brevity is the soul of the wit I’m—

I wonder if grapefruit juice wishes it was orange juice because it likes the commercials.

I wrote a song called Help but it turns out the Beatles already did it. Mine was more desperate but similar melody, it’s funny how they could see into the future.

If charity begins at home than someone gave the celebrity spokesperson my incorrect address.

I walked a mile in a man’s shoes and now I understand why he’s angry—he needs better arch support.

I wonder if chicken tenders are emotionally sensitive as well.

Once upon a time there was a man walking home in a thunderstorm and he took refuge under the awning of a music store—the origin of Singin in the Rain.

If transportation at the speed of light was perfected could you leave Los Angeles for Chicago and actually bring the weather with you like when people ask “send some warmth out way.”