Lessons for the Young

There is nothing we can do more important than passing on the knowledge we have acquired on this planet to the next generation. So I would like to share some things that I learned in my youth.

  • You can’t take a can of Pepsi and cover it with baking soda, put it in the oven and think you’ll get a Pepsi Pie.
  • Chickens can’t fly but people still want to eat their useless wings.
  • Even if you put ketchup on them, french fries that were in your nose should not be eaten.
  • There is no I in team but the shirts are cool.
  • If you get lost in the woods and drop breadcrumbs, the only thing you will get is animals you have to run from.
  • Pancakes with syrup are basically the same calories as regular cake, so don’t pretend it’s a healthy breakfast.

You’re welcome.

#youth #lifelessons


I Wonder…

  • if there are dolphin divas?
  • if chickens have wings would they swoop in and save their brethren from the deep fryer?
  • if aliens are laughing at YouTube videos but for a different reason?
  • why they don’t make a Siri for blue jeans—all she’d have to learn is “Not gonna make it.”
  • if bananas wish their skin was stickier so they wouldn’t cause so many accidents?