New Halloween Knock-Knock Jokes*

Knock Knock.

Who’s there?


Bat Who?

Bat-cha thought this was gonna be scary.


Knock Knock.

Who’s there?


Boo Who?

Boo-tiful day ain’t it?


Knock Knock.

Who’s there?


Werewolf Who?



Knock Knock.

Who’s there?

Trick or Treat.

Trick or Treat Who?

No, give me some candy!


*I said new ones, I didn’t say they’d be funny.




Halloween Water Cooler Talk 10-31-12

A special edition of my weekly water cooler talk. 

If Frankenstein always has those bolts, how come he’s never accidentally hit by lightning while he’s terrorizing the countryside?

If vampires can’t see their reflection, how do they look so sexy in Twilight or The Vampire Diaries? Do they do each other’s hair?

If those little candy bars are considered fun, why can’t we stop at just one?

I don’t care if I’m a vegetarian and love my fruits and vegetables, apples are still lame for trick-or-treat.

Do pumpkins ever want to carve our faces?

If there’s a full moon on Halloween does it get SERIOUS then?

I think women should dress like angels on Halloween and go for the slutty dress thing the other 364 days.

Halloween spelled backwards is neewollah. Now that sounds spooky; like some kind of Indian ghost.

My friend didn’t have any money and asked me for help with a costume. Since he has 500 thread count sheets he’s going as Casper the Snobby Ghost.

I hope the folks on the East Coast get to dress up as happy, relieved people tonight and enjoy some fun.