The Economy of Obesity



One of the more interesting developments of the troubled US economy is the expanding of America’s waistline. And it can be summed up in three words: Two for One.

The Great Depression

If you look at newsreels and photos from the Depression of the 30s, everyone was skinny. Unless that was because black and white film, unlike color, took away ten pounds unlike the current color film that adds ten pounds, which has made way too many actresses have way too many eating disorders. But really I don’t think so, I think there just wasn’t a lot of food. Of course, we were seeing the “best of”, excuse me “worst of” photographs that documented that time, but I’m pretty sure things weren’t good.

That’s because they didn’t have fast food.

In my travels, I have not seen a single fast food chain that didn’t tout some kind of 2 for 1 deal. That means that we’re consuming two sandwiches when one would take care of not only the requirements for that meal, but at the very least, take care of a few of those pesky in-between meal snacks. So two sandwiches would fill us up for the whole day. And that means just one thing: nap time. I don’t know about you, but if I eat a whole lot I would much rather sit and watch television as opposed to pounding the pavement trying to interview and tell bosses that I am the “man for the job.” I’d much rather unbutton my pants.

Now maybe I’m just a little guy, so I can’t consume as much and no one else can see this situation. But based on the TV ads for “combos”, that looks like it would take out at least 3/4 of the population, setting them into a recliner where, maybe, they would look for a job online. That is, if they have one of those tray thingys for their laptop because a big ole belly is just not stable.

So how can we blame the government for the current economic climate when we don’t feel like doing anything?

Now I understand both the consumer and the suppliers point of view. I take that back, I will never understand corporations. That’s because I have too much common sense. But I do understand the need to keep people’s jobs and so reducing their prices and using ways to get people in, preying on their need for value and their lack of understanding of how these sugars and sodiums work on our brains and…

Oh there I go again. Sorry, didn’t mean to get on a soapbox. Again, just don’t understand corporations. Why couldn’t they just have given the discount all along and charged the lower gas prices all along. But I’m a stupid idealistic boob who still believes that people can “wake up” and understand how easy it would be to just work together, man. It would be like so cool if, like we could just learn to only take what we need. And give back to each other in the ways that we need. Using the sun and the moon is in the seventh house and Jupiter aligns with Mars and peace will guide the planet and love will steer the stars, this is the dawning of the age-

Ahem. Sorry. Anyways big business does have to do their thing blah blah blah and of course I don’t want to see anyone lose their job: those uniforms are really stylish.

And I understand the consumer side. We all want some value right now. I get fast food. I don’t eat a lot of it. But that has more to do with the fact that five bucks buys me veggies enough to make juice for days. And I like that stuff. But that was a slow process. I will tell you this: I likes my snacks. And if there’s a day that I do a little pigging out on my favorites: like say pretzels and Fritos scoops, where you break off a piece of the big Dutch pretzel, put it in the little scoop and then dip it in the french onion dip with your Ben and Jerry’s pint next to you as well cause, hello, you have to have sweet with salty…I ain’t doing much the whole day. Whereas the buzz from those things, what are they called, nutrients, and I’m learning HTML5 and creating some bad-ass websites.

So America, let’s at least balance out the week! Fruits and veggies a couple of times a week. And slim down and get some work done. Save the munching for your day off. Then go have whatever you want and sit and watch TV. It is football season.



Water Cooler Talk I

Being self-employed I don’t enjoy the chit-chat that happens at the water cooler. So as I refill my glass from the Brita, I put my random ¬†thoughts out to you.
My seventh grade social studies teacher, while instructing us in the ways of the branches of government, told us that government was “by the people, for the people.” Oops.
Why do the people walking with other people, who are wearing ear or headphones, stand for it?
I just passed a Chinese food take-out that was open at 7:00am. You’re gonna be hungry in an hour, then how are you going to do your job? A donut would have lasted a lot longer.
If Sponge Bob Square Pants lives in the ocean he would absorb it all, so how come he doesn’t look like he took a dump in his shorts?
NOTE TO DRIVERS: That big, thick white line that comes before the stop sign is where you stop first, not pull over it ready to gun the engine like NASCAR.
If the Internet is wireless, why do we have to have things plugged in?
Note to cell phone manufacturers: you need to make them big again because people can’t be heard with the mouthpiece so far away now. Poor folks have to yell when they’re on the bus or in the grocery store.
So I just saw a video on CNN where the bride sang as she walked down the aisle and there was that cool one with the dance sequence. When is someone going to shove their hand up their groom’s behind and do a ventriloquism act?
The child obesity level is very high now and I’m hoping doctors have changed. Mine said my weight was fine as a pre-teen and that I would grow out of it, which led me to a life as a chubby teen with no girlfriends. But that guy was pushing 300 lbs. and smoked in the exam room. Let’s hope that only happens on Mad Men now.
I think bills should take a month or two off, then we’d appreciate them more.