Magic and Peace

Hello Folks, if you have a sec please click the link below to get this T-shirt in production at Threadless, I think a little more magic and peace would be a good thing. Thanks!

 

Threadless-t-shirt

 

https://www.threadless.com/designs/the-magic-starts-with-peace?utm_source=notification&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Design-Approved-Funding-Shared

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It Could be Simpler Times

peaceI often hear people talk about how it “used to be” and I catch myself sometimes complaining like an old man, in my head, without offering any real solutions. But I do think that as we age in this technical world we do lose much of the innocence of childhood and perhaps we need to learn to retain a little of that.

For men it comes down to one thing—boobies. We just need to be able to say the word more often and in their presence. Not as a symbol of the objectification of women, but the release of the pent up twelve year old that forever lives in our head. We like boobies, we like looking at boobies, and we like saying words like “boobies.” Give men the opportunity to point at and say “boobies” on a more regular, accepted basis and I guarantee you will create greater gender equality and stop harassment.

For women, well I just don’t want to say. I’ve learned not to say how women should act and I don’t want to be single forever so I don’t want to turn anyone off.

Ok, fine. Actually I think women should hit men more often. Not to hurt us, but like when you punched the boy at recess that you liked. We are confused by you in this “advanced” society and we don’t know if this is the generation that likes doors opened for you or finds that insulting. Punch us and tell us what you want. It’ll probably make everything clear and end the compensation discrimination.

More importantly than any separate suggestions are the three things we should all do for happier healthier lives for us all.

  1. Skip more often. It’s great exercise, you can’t help but smile while you’re doing it, and all the release of self-consciousness is the equivalent of everyone poops.
  2. Eat more peanut butter & jelly and ice cream. Just find yourself ridiculously happy with the simple. It’s so easy.
  3. Have a tantrum in public. We should be allowed to drop to the floor and wail like a baby when we’re not happy. Just get it out, loud and proud, and then get over it. We’re gonna stop wars that way.

That’s my thoughts, got any to add?

A Conversation Between Angels XII

“Next.”

“Is this check-in?”

“Yes it is. Name?”

“Pissed.”

“Excuse me.”

“I am pissed.”

“Is that your first name or your last?”

“Neither. My name is Steve and I am pissed off.”

“Well I’m sorry to hear that sir.”

“Yeah well can I talk to God. I mean…a plane crash?”

“I can tell you that God doesn’t control those things, he just set the wheels in motion.”

“Yeah well the big corporations set the wheels in motion and they’re getting bail outs.”

“You know, I really can’t help you, I can get your suite number for you.”

“Jeez, I do everything right: I pay my taxes, stay faithful to my wife, give my kids all the attention and things they need. And then BAM, gone in a second.”

“I really am sorry.”

“Well, how did you, uh, go?”

“Um…”

“Oh no, don’t tell me, in your sleep?

“Well sort of.”

“Sort of? Either you’re asleep or you’re awake?”

“Well my husband died, the love of my life, and I lay down and then joined him.”

“Oh come on! Like the Notebook, you died in bliss? And I turned down that invitation from the twenty-something to join the Mile High Club.”