Halloween Water Cooler Talk 10-31-12

A special edition of my weekly water cooler talk. 

If Frankenstein always has those bolts, how come he’s never accidentally hit by lightning while he’s terrorizing the countryside?

If vampires can’t see their reflection, how do they look so sexy in Twilight or The Vampire Diaries? Do they do each other’s hair?

If those little candy bars are considered fun, why can’t we stop at just one?

I don’t care if I’m a vegetarian and love my fruits and vegetables, apples are still lame for trick-or-treat.

Do pumpkins ever want to carve our faces?

If there’s a full moon on Halloween does it get SERIOUS then?

I think women should dress like angels on Halloween and go for the slutty dress thing the other 364 days.

Halloween spelled backwards is neewollah. Now that sounds spooky; like some kind of Indian ghost.

My friend didn’t have any money and asked me for help with a costume. Since he has 500 thread count sheets he’s going as Casper the Snobby Ghost.

I hope the folks on the East Coast get to dress up as happy, relieved people tonight and enjoy some fun.

 

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A Conversation Between Angels XVIV

“Hello Fred.”

“Hey Ethel.”

“Do you know what this week is?”

“How can I know what week it is, there’s no clocks, no TV, no radio.”

“I know, but I overheard the cleaning crew. It’s Halloween.”

“Oh, geez. Thank Heavens no one would put on a costume up here, we all have to dress alike.”

“I guess we’re all going as angels.”

“Better than all the silly pirates, vampires, clowns.”

“And all of the pumpkin carving; how many of those seeds can you eat?”

“Oye, not to mention all the ones they smashed on our front lawn.”

“Or all the tp-ing we got over the years.”

“And of course, all the neighborhood kids running around with all their trick-or-treating.”

Pause.

“I will miss the Snickers.”

“Baby Ruth.”